However, even with all these advancements, I still find that there is one task that technology has done nothing to help, and has probably hindered more than anything. Ever try and open something recently? It can be just about anything. A bag of chips, a pack of Magic cards. Where I am currently residing, we have lost our scissors, so opening things is even more of a challenge. If you doubt me, think back on the last present exchanging get together you had. I'm sure somebody around you, or perhaps you, received a CD or DVD. I find that it takes at least a song and a half of time to get INTO a CD. The packaging is cruel, and mocks us. "Pull here," it says, as though that's all it takes. Before you finally get it open, you turn into a wild beast, slashing at the plastic with fingernails and scissors.
While I guess I can flow with this, seeing as I can't remember an easier way, there is an experience I must share that surprised and disappointed me. My cousin Patrick and I recently made dinner for ourselves, and the logical choice was, of course, Kraft mac and cheese. The wonderfully orange taste of childhood. Patrick was off doing who knows what, and I was left alone with the boxes (oh yes, we ate two) of Kraft goodness. Anyone who has ever tasted this deliciousness knows that the side of the box has handy perforations and a kind reminder to "Push Here to Open."
Or at least, the side of the box HAD perforations. Oh yes readers. Perhaps the Kraft company decided to lend themselves to the anti-obesity wave in America and made opening mac and cheese more difficult on purpose. Perhaps they discovered that it took less money if they only created a dim reminder of what perforations are supposed to look like rather than taking the trouble to PUT THEM IN. I was forced to grab a knife and stab the box in the general area of the side. It's a children's food! Let the children eat! PUT THE DAMN PERFORATIONS BACK ON YOUR BOXES!!!
Or at least, the side of the box HAD perforations. Oh yes readers. Perhaps the Kraft company decided to lend themselves to the anti-obesity wave in America and made opening mac and cheese more difficult on purpose. Perhaps they discovered that it took less money if they only created a dim reminder of what perforations are supposed to look like rather than taking the trouble to PUT THEM IN. I was forced to grab a knife and stab the box in the general area of the side. It's a children's food! Let the children eat! PUT THE DAMN PERFORATIONS BACK ON YOUR BOXES!!!
Perhaps I'm overreacting, but this signifies a disturbing productivity trend. I find it creepy and wrong that I can google a list of John Travolta movies ON MY PHONE faster than I can open a box of Kraft. Some people say that working harder for things makes you appreciate them more. Maybe that's true of actual achievements, but the only thing I felt due to the backbreaking labor it took to OPEN THE DAMN BOX was frustration and stupidity. I felt like a caveman smashing something with a rock. I felt no sense of triumph, no elation, nothing, zilch, nada, zip.
Not until I dug into my half of the two boxes of macaroni that is. However, I still contest that the happy wonderful feeling I got once I was eating came from the food itself, not the trials and tribulations that I went through to open the box.
Now I'm going to struggle with an ice pop and hope that I don't chop a finger off in the process.
Cheers,
-T.A.D.
That is so true. I would like to point out, though, that Kraft Macaroni and Cheese takes all of 10 seconds and very little effort to open if you just peel the cardboard apart on top. The only time I've ever had problems is when I try to open the box the way it told me to.
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